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Dear Abby: A psychologist can help

● DEAR ABBY: I am a freshman in college, and I've been having an awful year. My family situation is extremely unstable, and I'm always afraid I'm going to be left alone. I have a great boyfriend, but I don't want to rely on him for money or a place to stay, even though I know he would support me if I needed it. I have to maintain a very high grade-point average to keep my scholarship and continue school. I work as much as I can; however, I can't support myself. I have always been an excellent student, but I feel like nothing in my life is in my control. I work hard and study all day and have no time to myself. I'm afraid I'm always going to be a burden to everyone close to me. Please help. - Stressed to the Max in New York

DEAR STRESSED: By studying hard and making your grades your highest priority, you are doing everything you should be doing right now. Before your grades become affected by your worrying, pay a visit to the student health center and ask to speak with a psychologist. Some sessions there will help you realize that your current situation is only temporary, and it won't be long before you achieve the independence you crave. ● DEAR ABBY: I'm a 31-year-old woman who broke off a two-year relationship with a man I love but who wouldn't commit to marriage. (I'll call him Paul.) We never lived together. Paul and I started talking again about two months ago, and he seemed to know more about me and what I was doing than I expected. After a few weeks of chatting, I finally figured out that Paul had been listening to my private answering machine messages. He must have obtained the code when I checked my messages from his home while we were dating. All my friends are saying I'm crazy to continue talking to him and seeing him, knowing he violated my privacy. I still have feelings for him. What's your take on this? - Confused in Rhode Island

DEAR CONFUSED: Frankly, what Paul did was not only a violation of your privacy, but it's also a little creepy. If you haven't already done so, change the pass code on your answering machine. Do not plan a future with him without extensive premarital counseling. What he did raises a red flag.